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Yes its sinking in.. Rank 40, CSE 2015.The UPSC circle- the close and the beginning.

Bagh-e-Bahisht Se Mujhe Hukam-e-Safar Diya Tha Kyun Kaar-e-Jahan Daraz Hai, Ab Mera Intezar Kar                      - Mohammad...

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

The thread of ice...

मै वक़्त हूँ, हरपल बहता हूँ,
हाँ रोज़ बदलता रहता हूँ  

लम्हा हूँ मगर,

जम सकता हूँ 
तेरी रूह में हिम -चादर बनके...
रफ़्तार हूँ पर, 
थम सकता हूँ 
तुझमे मै तेरी आदत बनके... 

मै धागा हूँ, 

जुड़ सकता हूँ
हाँ वक़्त हूँ मै ,
पगडंडी सा, 
मुड़ सकता हूँ
हाथों में दिखाई दे जाऊँ...
आँखों में सुनाई दे जाऊं..

मै साथ रहूँ और साथ नहीं 

मै हूँ भी नहीं, और हूँ भी कहीं... 
मै कौन हूँ, कैसा लगता हूँ?
मै नींद हूँ, फिर क्यों जगता हूँ
हूँ बर्फ हूँ तो क्यों सुलगता हूँ?
मैं धागा हूँ जुड़ सकता हूँ... 
Like time, I flow.
Like time, I am changing every day.
I am a thread of ice- the thread of time

Ephemeral, like the moments we shared
But I can also freeze infinitely
covering your soul
like these mountains covered in permanent snowline
white, pristine, limpid, yet cold.

Swift, like the velocity we moved with
But I can also pause indefinitely
forming a niche in you
like habit or proclivity.

I am a thread of ice- the thread of time
I can connect, coalesce, unite
Yet, like time I melt away.
But, if time bends, like these roads we travel on
You will see me, smiling in your palms
You will hear me humming your name, from some dimension in your eyes;
and You will be able to touch me with your thoughts...

I'm there with You, and yet elusive.
May be I do not exist, but I still am somewhere.
Who am I, how do I appear to your senses?
If I am a dream, then why do I stay awake?
If I am cold, frozen in time, then what in me still burns?

I am a thread of ice- the thread of time
I can connect, coalesce, unite
Yet, like time I melt away.
But time bends, like these roads we travel on
One day, You will see me, smiling in your palms
You will hear me humming your name,from some dimension in your eyes
and I will be able to touch your thoughts, your dreams...

picture source http://ladyamdis.deviantart.com/art/Frozen-Time-107978099

Friday, September 25, 2015

Were You the sun...

Wasn't that magic?
Those crystals in the waters...
Did you feel them as You watched over?
Did You touch them as You smiled?
White in blue,
diamonds on azure velvet,
like hope in your two eyes,
and the yellow hue
of your smile in contentment,
still and tranquil,
yet making them dance
like fairies...

Why were you doing this?
Were You the sun?
You wanted to burn the waters in your gleam?
Or you wanted to dissolve in them and then burn?
I wonder.
Photograph source- The crazy wonderful photographer philosopher friend.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

The difficulty of living in an empty space.

"There will be times in your life, when you do not know what you want.
But remember,
you always know, deep within what you need.

Do you need me then?
like air.
Like water.
Like fire.
Like the sky, and
Like the earth..."

Asked the star to the tree on a distant planet.

The difficulty of living in an empty space is that
you are so full of light and dark,
matter and anti-matter,
galaxies and black-holes,
and still
you are 
the empty space.

photograph source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/508343876669472800/

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

The business cycles..

Seems like my life has become a business cycle.

Its like, you start with a boom,
inspired and ignited.

By, the evening, a slowdown sets in.
You have to go out, searching for some happiness on the streets,
knowing that its not where it'll be found,
and you'll come back home empty- handed.

By dusk, there is a recession in your heart,
and something within you is crying.
Still you are constantly trying to fool the crying child,
with 'the stimulus' of inspiration.
But the stimulus doesn't work now,
for your macro-economic fundamentals
stand shaken.

Nights, breezy or calm, moonlit or dark-
you are in a depression.
You hallucinate.
You get lost.
Nothing works.
You gaze at the far away moon and the stars from your window with a longing in those two brown eyes,
but you fear talking,
so the depression doesn't spread,
so there are no 'competitive devaluations'
You fear them- people
No, you fear yourself.

You sleep just before the dawn,
with a hope, 
of another morning,
and of some morning when
the cycle would end
and you would live 
'happily ever after'.

Seems like my life has become a business cycle.
picture source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746809235608/


Empty is this vessel, my body
But its sound is not
It still rustles, throbs, warbles.
And to this world,
its sound can be music.
It can be noise, turbulence, chaos.
And it can be deafening silence.

Empty is my soul, my mind.
But its core, its foundation is not.
For it still knows to love.
And to this world,
its love can be sacred.
It can be ugly, wanton, sinful.
And it can be casually indifferent.

Empty is my word, my song.
But its meaning is not.
And I will still keep humming it.
For if this world understands it a little
It will become full, my word.
And if You, that someone somewhere in this world,
can understand it full,

I would make You my world.

Your words are like fairies...

The day YOU run out of words;
Trace these words, 
YOU once shared with ME here, backwards...
connecting all the dots,
and find Yourself back.

Your words are like fairies.
They guided ME.
They'll guide YOU back
Photograph source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/242842604883805066/

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Those wonderful what ifs...

What if?
All those magnificent things
You could never see clear
from that distance you had lost yourself in
did exist..

For they always do.
The hazy
after all,
is clear somewhere.
Its about what radius far away
you look at it.

Photo source: A crazy wonderful photographer philosopher friend:)

Enjoy the music..

And one day,
when your pieces were falling down, 
they asked,
Do you rhyme?
photograph borrowed from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/65935582020534418/

Saturday, September 19, 2015


रंग पूछे राग से ,क्यों न थिरके अपनी धुन पे तू ?
राग बोले, भर दे मुझे भी ज़रा तू यूँ .... 

नींद पूछे ख्वाब से ,क्या नहीं है सच तू बता ?
ख्वाब कहे, आजा तू, मै सच हो जाऊँगा .... 

लफ़्ज़ पूछे कागज़ से ये, क्यों है कोरा अब भी मन तेरा 
कागज़ बोले, छू दे तू, पूरा हो जाऊँगा मै .... 
photograph source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746809337361/

Friday, September 18, 2015

The immaculate encounters..

नींदों को जगा  देना ऐसे 
मुझे मुझसे मिला देना ऐसे 
मै  रागों सा गूंजू ,मै लम्हे सा ठहरूँ,
मै रंगों सा बिखरुं, मै पानी सा बह लूँ.. 

नींदों को जगा  देना ऐसे 

मुझे मुझसे मिला देना ऐसे 
मै ना बोलूँ मेरा अक्स कहे 
मै ठहरूँ जब, जग रक्स करे
बंदिश न हो, ख्वाहिश न हो 
बूँदें हों पर बारिश न हो .. 

आवाज़ न हो , संगीत मगर 

कानों में सुनाई दे जाए 
तू न हो मेरे घर में मगर, 
दर्पण में दिखाई दे जाए 

तू और कहीं भी रहता हो 

मुझमें तू मगर, मेरे अंदर है 
माथे पे मेरे सूरज की तरह 
तू रोज़ सवेरे उगता है 
पलकों में मेरी, तू आज भी सुन 
सपनों की तरह जी उठता है. 

कब फिर तुझसे मिल पाउँगा 

ये सोच नहीं मै पाता हूँ 
पर  अब मुझसे, जब मिलता हूँ 
मै  तुझसे भी मिल जाता हूँ 
मै तुझसे भी मिल जाता हूँ। 
picture source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746809222660/

Thursday, September 17, 2015

The grave of custom- part 2

We humans are a great species.
August, enlightened, magnificent.

We first invented them-
The rituals, institutions
as an effort to find our happiness.
Then, we called them 'sacred',
knowing that the word itself stands
without a definition, or with many.
Then we tied them with 'duties' and obligations
went on making 'them' bigger
and 'us' smaller.

So, today
The ritual survives.
The institution shines high,
with its pointed arches and ribbed vaults.
But, A human stands there

Who killed him/her?
The ritual or its maker?
I wonder.

Related posts:

Monday, June 15, 2015

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

The brush and the half painted life.

The red brush on the palette..
glanced at her portrait
half painted,
right beside the window by the painter's bed.

It wished to touch her half painted form
with that invincible desire,
to complete it.

to heal it. 

Two lives just crossed.

Two lives just ignited.

picture source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/82824080617942835/

Why do we lie?

She: "Illusions are lies, or lies are illusions?",

He: "Illusions are not real. So, they lie.

We lie, when we can't face the real, we are afraid of the truth. So we create illusions, to make things a bit easy."

She: "Why did YOU lie? Were YOU afraid of facing the real or because YOU did not trust ME and my truth.."

photo source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746809274625/

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Temperature inversion...

Temperature inversion.

Is She there around,
hung as moisture in the air?
Is she suspended in that nothingness,
now only in the memory of
Him, the Emerald Leaf.
Or in His dream.
Years back she was real.

The Emerald leaf-
now cold,
now numb,
shivering in that long 
wintery night.

Is that her memory or her dream
who meets him
as moisture
every dawn,
hears the silence
of his words,
and becomes the dew drop?
Limpid, pure
radiant, smiling..

He calls her his dew drop.
She calls him her emerald leaf.

Temperature inversion...
Photograph source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746809202908/

The song this world does not understand..

There was music in your heart.
Deep there, beneath the silence of your words.

I know You will sing again.
I pray You do.
Only time.
picture source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746809189169/

Tuesday, September 8, 2015


इस जहाँ,मेँ मेरी,
ये ज़बां,क्यों मेरी,
कोई समझे नहीं... 
थक गया हूँ मै; 
चुप अब मै होने लगा हूँ।  

खुद को चाहत सिखा देना खुदगर्ज़ी तो नहीं 
किसको चाहूँ मै? 
मै खुद को ही खोने लगा हूँ।  

इस जहाँ,का अगर,मै नहीं,
तो कहीं  
कोई घर,कोई आयाम,
कोई होगा मेरा... 

फिर रहा,
हूँ किसे,
इस जहां,
में मै क्यों,
दे बता,ऐ खुदा
ऐ खुदा ..
ये मेरा कौन था?
वो मेरा कौन है ?
कौन अरमान है?
कौन अनजान है?
दे बता,ऐ खुदा
ऐ खुदा ..

Monday, September 7, 2015

I know YOU can't.

If YOU can build me again, then please do.

But I know YOU can't.
For, only I can.
And I'm truly trying.

What of me can You conquer?

You can conquer my body, my words, yes even my thoughts.

Centuries back, there was a different Europe. And due to its achievements in modern state, scientific revolution, and industrial revolution, it considered itself 'dynamic' and the rest of the world as 'incapable of change'. And so it wished to 'breathe life' into these countries, claiming to understand them, their languages, their histories better than they themselves could hope to.

This is also a form of conquest. it is the conquest of the processes by which people understand themselves, and find their peace.

Don't try to conquer me, through my body, my words, or even my thoughts.
Conquer me, by that smile on your face, that fire in your eyes and that touch on my hand, which still thrill me with your magic.
For,then even in the conquering, You shall set me free.

P.S: As Tagore said, "There is only one difference between SLAVERY AND LOVE, that SLAVERY IS BONDAGE, and LOVE SETS YOU FREE."
picture source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746807885506/

Friday, September 4, 2015

Roshni- 3: Let me change like this city

क्या ये एहसास है? जो बदलता नहीं 

सब बदल जाएगा,ये रहेगा वही?

मै मगर आज,हाँ,इस शहर की तरह

क्या पता,चाहता हूँ बदलना मगर...

तू मुझे फिर बदलते हुए देखना 

हर सुबह नभ-सा जलते हुए देखना 

और मुझे धूप-छाओं के इस खेल में ;

गिरते उठते संभलते हुए देखना

हाँ सवेरे से जब रात हो जायेगी,

इस ज़मीं की हर इक चीज़ सो जाएगी,

देर तक जागते मेरे दो नैन में;  

एक अधूरा-सा बन ख्वाब जलना मगर।

रास्तों में कहीं रौशनी मिल गयी

मंज़िलों तक मेरे साथ चलना मगर। 

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Have you heard the silence of the air...

कि चल आज ले चल मुझे इस शहर से परे , 
कुछ पहाड़ों में डूबूं ...
की चल दूर हर एक डगर से,कहीं जा
समन्दरों पर चढ़ूँ फिर...  
खुली फिर हवा में 
मुझे साथ तेरे 
गगन को चुराना...

मै सोया नहीं हूँ बहुत दिन से थक कर 
मै रोया नहीं हूँ,बहुत दिन से मै घर 
गया भी नहीं हूँ 
मै पिघला नहीं हूँ बहुत दिन से मुझमे 
जमा तू हुआ है.. 

मै ऐसा करूँ क्या,जो खो जाऊं इस ख़ूबसूरत जहाँ में 
जो मिल जाऊ खुद को किसी आसमां में
मै ऐसा करूँ क्या? मै क्या जीत जाऊं? 
जो हर शख्स अपना-सा लगने लगे फिर... 
ये जग रक्स करता-सा लगने लगे फिर...
photograph credits: Mayank Mediratta